Breath


I pulled a muscle in my back yesterday shortly before my acupuncture appointment. It's better, but I still move gingerly. Turns out that something as simple as reaching for a towel can cause a muscle to seize and kick the air out of my lungs. I am also concerned about the fact that my acupuncturist is leaving in February for two or three months to visit family in her home country, and she will have a new location for her business when she returns. I'm hoping that it will be in the same area. Or closer.

Meanwhile, I've read three books this year, making a good start on my Goodreads reading challenge of 24 books this year. I haven't been writing, just thinking about it. We moved into our new home in December, went away for the holidays, and only this weekend cleared out the remaining boxes on the ground floor so that it actually looks like a place where people live, instead of a place people have moved into. And I've had insomnia for about a week (actually, it's been chronic for years). It's a struggle to think cohesively.

So today I am making beef stew in the slow cooker. And I made chocolate chip walnut cookie dough to bake later. I like doing that. First, because it lets the flavors combine. Second, because it makes me feel like I'm getting something done even though I'm putting it off until later.

I've decided to practice meditation daily this year. Ideally, twice a day. I've attempted this before, going well for about a week, then feeling like I was too busy to meditate, or just thinking that I'll do it later, and then the habit slips away. No one is too busy to meditate. Even three minutes of meditation is effective meditation. And I've got different meditation formats to choose from that will always fit my need. Really, I am never too busy. Who am I kidding? I just like to feel like I have lots to do and I have to get started right away. But I am not too busy, or even busy. My life is easy, a blessing. It's my mind that is busy, too busy, working up problems, reasons, justifications, fears, routines and patterns that aren't even real, or relevant anymore. And so I breathe, and remember that being too busy is a way of disconnecting from the present. It is regretting the past and worrying about the future. I do not regret making chocolate chip walnut cookie dough, nor am I worried about how the cookies will turn out. I just keep breathing.

Besides, no one is ever too busy for a cookie.

#acupuncture #meditation #busy

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